My Air

Music.

Yes, it's kind of a cliché thing to talk about and get all philosophical with, but at the same time, how can you not? Because when you really think about it, music is so much more than notes with a rhythm. I love how the movie August Rush puts it. 'God's little reminder that there's something else besides us in this universe, a harmonic connection between all living beings, every where, even the stars.'

It's an expression of feeling, personality, belief, opinion, stories. It can save your life. It can change your life. It affects everything. A scene in a movie can dramatically change if music or added, or even if the music already there is changed.

It doesn't even have to have melody. Everything in every day has music to it. Everything has a beat, a rhythm.

And there are so many different ways to create it. Singing, instruments, or just pounding on an empty trash can. And there are all the intstruments! Guitar, piano, mandolin, flute, cello, trumpet, sax, xylophone, drums, harp, harmonica, accordian, violin, bass.

Music is like air to me. With out it, it'd be really hard to survive. It fills a part of me than cannot be filled by anything else.

The music is all around you, all you have to do is listen. -August Rush

Love

Okay, so this was really interesting to me. I decided to look up the definition of love, and this is what I found on dictionary.com:

–noun
1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. sexual passion or desire.
4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.
5. (used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love?
6. a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour.
7. sexual intercourse; copulation.
8. (initial capital letter) a personification of sexual affection, as Eros or Cupid.
9. affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one's neighbor.
10. strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: her love of books.
11. the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love.
12. the benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God.
13. Chiefly Tennis. a score of zero; nothing.
14. a word formerly used in communications to represent the letter L.
–verb (used with object)
15. to have love or affection for: All her pupils love her.
16. to have a profoundly tender, passionate affection for (another person).
17. to have a strong liking for; take great pleasure in: to love music.
18. to need or require; benefit greatly from: Plants love sunlight.
19. to embrace and kiss (someone), as a lover.
20. to have sexual intercourse with.

Now granted, these are all pretty good definitions. But how can you define something that is basically...indefinable? I think there's so much more to love than just affection or a 'warm feeling'. Love is sacrificing. Giving of yourself to another person. It's more than just a feeling. It's a choice. You may have affection for someone, but love is a whole different level of affection. Love isn't just romance either. You can truly love your friends just like you can truly love your spouse. It's just different versions of a love that is whole and complete. You honestly can't define it. It's like trying to make a plant talk to you.

On another note, I am getting frustrated with people talking crap about other people behind their backs. How can I trust friends if they aren't loyal to others?

Maybe I'm overthinking this.

This. Is. Awesome.

You know what I love? When there's crap that should bring me down, but doesn't. I have had such a great day today!

• Got caught up some more in German.
• Finished my not-done algebra homework before the end of class.
• Pretty sure I did well on my test in that class too.
• Woke up to lovely warm weather and NO SNOW!!!
• Had a wonderful lunch talking to Jenna. I even stopped eating before I was stuffed!
• Chemistry was extremely easy today.
• Got to go to the midnight premiere of WATCHMEN!!!
• Met some really cool guys.
• Got some more entries for the journal.

And to top it all off, I got a gigantic Rice Krispie's Treat!

What seriously rules though is even though we had a partially evil sub in German, my chem teacher was in a bad mood, my mom was moaning and groaning about people, the dog got into my room, and I spent all my money for lunch, I'm still in a terrific mood.

Great day so far, and I get to hang out with Jo and Carter tonight! Plus more fun planned for this weekend. I love life. Oh, and you need to go see Watchmen. But, you should definitely read the book first. You'll appreciate the movie a bit more.

I need to get into night photography...

I have found my 'Mr. Freeman'

First, let me define who Mr. Freeman is to me.

A little background, he's a character from the book Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson. He is an art teacher who connects with the main character, Melinda, and she confides in him.

He is open to his students. He has a different outlook on life than most people. He's down to earth. He cares about his students. He's transparent.

Now, I would say that this all describes my theology teacher this semester. Well, except he isn't an art teacher, obviously.

Have you ever had someone really show that they care about you?

My teacher tells us he cares about us all the time. I actually know that now.

I spent about two and a half hours talking to him after school today, about the crap going on in my life, about life in just general, questions I had, movies, the school, the church, and so much more. How many teachers do you know who'd spend hours talking to one of their students, when they might have a ton of work to do? I've met some who would be willing to talk to me, but only for a bit before they had to go. Not this time. He sat there listening to me moan and groan about stuff, but he sat there because he wanted to help. I can't describe how grateful I am to him.

It's an amazing feeling to truly know that someone cares.

Maybe you can give that to someone you know?

You know what I hate?

When people are so incredibly bored with their own lives that they have to get their nose in other people's business. Example, two of my friends just ended their relationship. Now EVERYBODY is taking either his side or her side, even though they weren't in the relationship and should instead just stay out of it. But no, everyone's so bored that they just HAVE to get involved. They're making this worse than it already is, and it's not helping the situation at all.

This is exactly why high school dating is stupid. It ruins friendships.

High schoolers are extremely stupid sometimes.

Rushing

Ever feel like life is going by too fast?

I hate it when days go by too fast. It feels like they're wasted. I don't get a chance to take in the day, and appreciate the fact that I am alive then and there. I'm going to try the pace I'm going at in life. I need to stop everyonce in a while and realize where I am. I don't know how I'm going to do it. Thankfully New Testament helps me with that. The class just seems to help me slow down from the day/week.

I wish I could be thankful for more.

A quick story...I caught something today, and it was interesting. I caught myself being lazy. That's interesting considering how lazy I am all the time. I'm sitting here at my desk, playing my guitar, and I notice it's out of tune. I look to my left and see my guitar tuner with the plug-in cable sitting on the floor about two and a half feet away from me. I think to myself, 'Okay, maybe I can reach it without getting up.' Hang on a second! This is my next thought- 'What am I doing? Is it really going to kill me to get up and move a couple of feet to get a cable?' I caught myself being lazy...and I've never done that before. I did end up getting up and getting the cable. I'm going to make more of an effort to seize every opportunity that's presented to me. A bit of a twist on the 'Carpe Diem' mood everyone tries to live by.

It's happening...

So I have found a way that I can make a difference in this world...and people will remember it. I bought a journal last Friday, and I'm having people write in it. They can write whatever they want really. There's no limit. It's not my journal. It's for everyone else. It's a journal for you. I'm trying to muster up the courage though to go up to people I don't know well and ask them to write in it. I've done that twice- first guy didn't want to because he's 'not much of a writer' (Which is bullcrap because EVERYBODY is a writer.) and the second guy worked at Parkside, so of course he would. I dunno, it's a lot to ask of someone you don't know. People you do know are going to obviously be receptive, but if you don't know someone, their caught off guard. I mean, how scary is it to leave a piece of yourself with a total stranger? I think it could also be freeing if you let it. I just hope some people can find some little form of healing with it. Sometimes just writing something down can make a big difference to them.

I'm no longer afraid of death...this is what I've been waiting to find- a way to help the world one person at a time.